David's Birth Story 3.9.16

David's Birth Story

Ready to meet our little guy!

Excited to be checked in!

  Despite all the many things we tried to bring on labor naturally, we reported to the hospital on Tuesday, March 8th (we were supposed to go in Monday night but they didn't have room for us and we kept calling every two hours until midnight when they finally said call back at 6 in the morning). We were quite a pair- me and my big belly and all the bags and Bryan on crutches since he was still recovering from his knee surgery. They hooked me up to pitocin for about 4 hours and then gave me cervadil over night. Progress was very, very slow. They next morning they gave me more pitocin and I bounced around on a birthing ball like crazy hoping it would somehow help him move down. They then gave me an epidural around 1 pm for pain management (as a preventative for my heart) and then broke my water. I had such sweet nurses, and it was so fun seeing some of the same ones who helped deliver Caleb. We even had one who had the privilege of getting blood splattered on her face when they had to cut the cord wrapped around his neck (so she definitely remembered us).

Just hanging out for hours and hours

Around 6:15 pm on Wednesday Dr. Adam showed up, and I was so excited to see her. I hadn't been checked in 5 hours or so,  so I was excited and hopeful to see progress. I was the only one in the room at the time, as the nurses had gone next door to redo an IV on their other patient and Bryan went downstairs to eat with his parents. Dr. Adam goes in to check me and then has the strangest look on her face (which of course makes me terrified). She says, "Oh, that is not a tunnel. No. That is not a tunnel. You've got to be kidding me. That is your baby's hand." See the whole time my nurses were checking me they thought that my inner and outer cervix was dilating at different rates- making somewhat of a tunnel. Now it was clear what they had been feeling. I exclaim, "What do you mean, it's his hand?!" Dr. Adam then compares him to someone who is diving into a pool. He was attempting to dive out of me- so his forearm and hand where in the birth canal (like a turkey leg). I asked her if she could push his arm back in. She tried, but was afraid she would break his arm so then she said, "No. You are going to get a c-section. Where is your husband?"


I am not proud to say I was an emotional wreck. This was my biggest fear. I started sobbing...uncontrollably sobbing. I called Bryan to get him to come back upstairs. I called my mom and asked her to come up to the hospital (We had thought it would be hours before David would be born). I didn't know Dr. Adam had meant like right now you are going to get a c-section, but it became clear when she started ordering everyone around. Within minutes they were rolling me out of the room to prep me for surgery. It was then I tell them my epidural only worked on one side of my body. So they took some time to fix that, and it made me a nervous wreck afraid I was going to feel them do the surgery. I couldn't stop crying. My doctor knew I didn't want a c section, but I don't think she understood why. There were many reasons. One, I wanted to experience giving birth again- the amazing feeling of pushing out your baby is just like nothing else. Two, I didn't want to be cut into and have to heal for many reasons. One being I knew the recovery would be longer and harder and that I wouldn't be able to lift anything heavier than David for what I thought was 6 weeks. I couldn't bare this. This is why I kept sobbing. I kept thinking I wasn't going to be able to pick up Caleb for 6 weeks. I was already worried about his adjustment and now my heart just broke picturing his little arms reaching up to me and me having to tell him Mommy couldn't hold him. I was also worried about lifting him in and out of his crib/ the car/ his highchair/ the changing table, etc.  Everyone who has kids close together always says the first part is the hardest and then it's wonderful. I was just worried this would make it even harder. But, I had no choice at this point. I just prayed God would give us a healthy baby and spare my life. There were also crazy irrational thoughts going through my mind that I was going to die- I told Bryan I loved him and to tell the boys I loved them so much in case anything happened to me. It was all very scary. And I was full of such disappointment about the way things happened, but I knew it was just a fluke thing. My doctor said out of 5,000 babies she has delivered, this is only the 3rd time she has seen this.

Once we were in the surgery room things happened very quickly and I felt strange tugging and then heard our sweet baby boy's cry for the first time. David Robert Hughes made his entrance at 7:18 pm.

Dr. Adam introducing us to our son

getting all clean

First time holding David

skin to skin/ so thankful he is okay

3.9.16 7:18 pm 8lbs 13 oz 21.5 inches

I got to do skin to skin with him for a few minutes before I told them to take him because I got extremely nauseous. A second after they took him I threw up all over myself. Then the shaking happened. Bryan left the room with David and the Dr. got me stitched up and a few nurses who stayed behind wrapped things up and then they rolled me back to my room. Thankfully I saw my mom and dad in the hall at that exact time. I don't think I have ever been more thankful to see my Mom in my whole life. Back in the room I started shaking uncontrollably for probably an hour or so. Bryan and I got to spend time with just David and that was wonderful and sweet. I got to feed him and he did such a great job- he knew exactly what to do!

 BUT EVEN IF HE DOESN'T

Having a c-section still makes me sad. Even 10 weeks later I still have pain/ weird sensation on the skin between my belly button and incision that feels almost like the skin was rubbed raw or that I had a really bad sunburn (I have asked others and most do not have this happen so don't let this scare you if you have to get a c section....I have found online stories of other women having this as a side effect- nerve damage most likely. I just hope it goes away eventually). My incision is also still numb. It hurts where the waistband of clothes sit. It was not ideal and was not my plan. But at the end of the day, we are so thankful David is here and that God has given us this precious baby boy to love. It is a huge thing to be entrusted with another life. I was tempted to be angry at God or feel like He had "let us down". After all, we had prayed for many things in the last several months that hadn't turned out how we hoped. We prayed Bryan's knee surgery would be simple, and it was more complicated than they thought and took a recovery period on crutches for 5 weeks. We prayed I would go into labor naturally and I had to be induced. We prayed I wouldn't have a c-section, and I ended up having a c-section. We prayed for a go-with the flow baby and we got another challenging one (Bryan has joked we should just adopt our next kid). It is tempting to believe our prayers do not matter, but I KNOW that is not true. God hears us. He is sovereign and has every right to say, "No". We have to trust Him even when things don't turn out the way we want. Like the young men who called upon God to save them when they were thrown into the fiery furnace said, "But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up." Daniel 3:18 The day after David was born was a very difficult day. I was nauseous almost the entire day, but was trying to keep it together, and I was very sad about not being able to give birth the way I wanted to, but the Bible study I was going through at the time happened to be on Mary and Martha and Lazarus (John 11). I was reminded that Jesus did not answer Mary and Martha's request to heal their brother. He said, "No", and they gave up on the miracle. When Jesus shows up they felt like He was too late. But Jesus surprised them! He raises Lazarus from the dead! He always denies the lesser for the greather. We have to trust Him even when, especially when things don't go according to our plan. A couple sweet friends shared this article with me: Better than a Birth Plan and I felt like it was a small gift from God that it just happened to be posted on David's birthday. It was balm to this Martha's heart, and made me feel like God was lovingly showing me in His grace He hadn't forgotten me. It is good to be broken. It is good to be reminded that we are not in control. Thankful to be broken for this life to come out of me, and most of all thankful Jesus was broken for us, weak and weary sinners who need Him so and like Mary and Martha so often want it our way.

I couldn't wait for him to wear this sleeper!

he never wants to put those hands down...no wonder he was coming out arm/hand first

Caleb meeting his brother for the first time:

For a 17.5 month old, Caleb did pretty well over all. Bryan and I were so excited to see him because we hadn't seen him since Monday night and it was Thursday. That was the longest by far since he has been born that either of us have gone without seeing him and we missed him. Caleb was a little confused at first (maybe because we were all staring at him and taking pictures and videos) and he kept crying and wouldn't come to me but then would hold up his arms like he wanted me to pick him up (I had to hold back tears). But after a little while he warmed up. 

one of my favorite all time pictures. ever.

the first of many times, I'm sure that he will make his little bro cry

Caleb's gift from David- Curious George and Book!

First Family Photo

Visitors (not pictured: Gigi, Poppy, Paw Paw and Ale. The first day I was so out of it I didn't remember to take all the pictures but they were all there to welcome David!)

Uncle Tanner and Aunt Hayden

Aunt Kayla

Mimi

 Uncle Blake

with his door sign!

Recovery:

The recovery for the c section was much harder for me than for my vaginal delivery. I was so thankful my Mom was on spring break so she got to stay with us for the first week and then the second week Bryan took off of work. I wasn't allowed to drive for two weeks or lift anything heavy (much better than the 6 I originally thought!). I also wasn't able to take pain medicine without feeling incredibly nauseous, so all in all it was just a rough few weeks. And we were so hopeful David was going to be an "easy" baby after our experience with Caleb, but for the first 7-8 weeks of his life he woke up every 20 minutes to an hour (sometimes an hour and a half) and it was just incredibly hard in every aspect(we've also made several trips to the doctor), but more on that later...

I am trying to learn to be grateful and look for God's grace even in this hard season of adjustment. I don't want to just wish this infant stage away. These are the days of our life. These are the days we are living in. I don't want to miss them. I want to live them and find joy even when I am sleep deprived and haven't showered in days and Caleb has watched Nemo 30 times since we brought David home from the hospital and I keep thinking, "well if David were an "easy" baby then such and such.... ". There is much to be thankful for. We have two boys! We have a home and food and clothes and my parents who live close by. We have an amazing community that have loved us well with meals and gifts and encouraging texts and phone calls and who have come over and held our baby and let us borrow things.

Welcome baby boy!

Ready to go home:

In his take home outfit

sweet sleepy smile

we couldn't wait to go home! (after 5 days!)