Can I see?

"Can I see?", a question I get asked quite often by my sweet 3 year old. The most recent of which occurred on the way to story time this morning. We had some overdue library books to return and Caleb asked me if we remembered to bring them. I told him we had and that they were in the front seat by me. To which he replied, "Can I see?" I explained to him that I was driving, but when I came to a stopping point I held them up so he could see from the backseat and he was satisfied. Mom had indeed told him the truth. The library books sat in the front seat waiting to be returned. And this got me thinking about the many times he asks this question. Most often it has to do with food (specifically chips) when I tell him the bag is empty or there are no more he asks to see as if we are some how not being honest with him or dare I say keeping some for ourselves? No one told him ask this question. He came up with him all on his own and I think that has something to do with the intrinsic idea of faith. Does he take us at our word? 

As a follower of Christ, I have been so careful to be true to my word with my children because I know how I parent will affect their view of God, the Father and His Word. Sometimes I mess up, but for the most part if I say something, to the best of my ability, I follow through. I want them to know they can trust me, and that what I say will happen. So I stop and think before I promise something, and if I say I will read a certain book after nap time for instance, you better believe Caleb remembers. As soon as he wakes up he asks for that book. When Caleb first asked me the question, "Can I see?", I have to admit I was a little hurt. How could he not believe me? I am his Mom! Have I lied to him before? Does he think I am holding out on him? And this morning when Caleb asked me the question I felt God whisper in my soul....this is how I feel when you ask me, "Can I see?". You aren't trusting me. You are not taking me at my Word.

One of my most favorite accounts in Scripture is of a royal official who comes to Jesus pleading with Him to heal His son. When Jesus tells him his son is healed, the man just takes Him at His Word and leaves. What faith that man had! 

So Jesus said to him, 'Unless you see signs and wonders you will not believe'. The official said to him, 'Sir come down before my child dies'. Jesus said to him, 'Go; your son will live.' The man BELIEVED the word that Jesus spoke to him and went on his way. As he was going down, his servants met him and told him that his son was recovering. So he asked them the hour when he began to get better, and they said to him, Yesterday at the seventh hour the fever left him. The father knew that was the hour when Jesus had said to him, 'Your son will live. ' And He himself believed, and all of his household. John 4:48-53

Oh, how I long to be one who takes Him at His word and leaves. 


"Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God."
 Matthew 5:8

Pure here means purified by fire, sincere, genuine. It makes me think of the story of the refiner's fire. The metal is continually dipped in the fire and the silversmith knows it is complete when he can see his reflection in it. Sometimes this whole battle of fear feels like it will never end, but God purifies us through trial. And as He does, we will be able to SEE Him (behold Him) and He will begin to see more and more of Himself in us as we yield to His Spirit in us. He must become greater, we must become less (John 3:30). 

So when Caleb asks me, "Mama, can I see?" I patiently show him (prove myself) just as Jesus did with Thomas. Thomas wanted to see the holes himself and Jesus showed him, but replied "Because you have seen me, you believe. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe." (John 20:29). But I want my son to simply believe me because I love him and I am telling him the truth. I want him to trust me, and I know our faith is what pleases God. 

If you are in a place where you are tempted to wonder if God is indeed telling you the truth, if His Word can be trusted, or if He is perhaps holding out on you (Psalm 84:11), remember He is good. He is our Father and we can take Him at His Word. Faith becomes our sight: when we believe, we do  often get to see (if not this side of heaven, I know we will see in full there). Perhaps the way we battle fear is by asking Him to give us eyes to truly see Him, see others and ourselves as He does. I encourage you to walk by faith and not by sight (2 Cor. 5:7). Take the next step and watch Him provide! If He can show you, as He did with Thomas, He will, but sometimes He may not be able to show you what He is doing yet. He may be working on things behind the scenes and they just are not ready to be unveiled yet. But hold on, when He comes to a stopping point (like I did while driving this morning) He may be able to show you. Continue that walk because He is true to His Word and He loves you.

"Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. For by it, the men of old gained approval....and without faith, it is impossible to please Him, for He who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him." Hebrews 11:1, 6